Few things are harder than that one rejects himself. That you avoid the mirrors of your house because what you see reflected in them displeases you. A person with self-esteem problems may come to hate himself / herself and prefer to stay locked up at home because he does not consider himself worthy of leading a life like others and prefers not to face the gaze of the other.
People with low self-esteem make a biased and unrealistic self-evaluation of themselves. In front of that mirror, they build their self-image by stopping at the defect they see and amplifying it in a disproportionate way until it ceases to be a defect to become a complex.. Regarding your self-concept, that is to say, the idea that I have about myself, the person with low self-esteem only continually tells himself negative messages: "You are not worth it", "You will not be able", "This can be allowed by others, but you do not", for what they experience negative emotions towards their person. The achievements they achieve on a day-to-day basis are underestimated ("well, that could be done by anyone ") and in the end just remember the negative. Regarding thoughts about others, they will tend to think that he / she is a hindrance to people or that everyone laughs at him / her, making wrong interpretations about what is going on around them with a negative bias ("He has not greeted me because he does not like me") when it can also be for many other reasons ("for example, the person is nearsighted and does not see far "). And if there are people who if they pay attention and want to be with him / her, they will think that they do it because they feel sorry.
Low self-esteem can trigger an anxiety disorder ("Everything scares me because I don't trust myself and my abilities") and depression ("I am not motivated by anything because I do not consider myself valid for anything and, Thus, I have no illusions "). Also on many occasions it leads us to situations of emotional dependence towards a partner ("I only feel that I am worth if I am worth the other") e, even, we can become victims of abuse if we are not able to say "no" and set limits. If I don't respect myself, how am I going to ask the other to do it??
Sometimes it is difficult to get out of that self-destructive dynamic, but it is vital. The first step is to take off those negativity glasses and give yourself a chance to start seeing life differently.. I will stand in front of the mirror and start giving myself positive messages. At first, I might look a little ridiculous doing it, but soon I will begin to notice the positive consequences of pampering myself. As for my physique, what I don't like and can be changed, I will aim to change it. And what cannot be changed, I will start an acceptance job. I will do more realistic self-assessment work, admitting the negative things about me (but eliminating the all or nothing language) and I will incorporate the positive things. I will talk better, I will have the same touch towards myself that I would have towards my best friend. And as for the interpretations of the behaviors of others, to the negative automatic interpretation that usually comes to me from things ("I have entered the class and everyone has started laughing at me") I will open the range of possibilities why they are laughing ("Maybe one of them just told a joke").
And I'm going to pat myself on the back and reward myself every time I get one thing., without waiting for someone to congratulate me on it. Nor will I constantly put the other before what I need because in this way I forget about myself. And I will trust my criteria without having to continually contrast it with someone, even at the risk of being wrong. Because I will also allow myself to be wrong.
Work self-esteem
In yours psychologists we can work on self-esteem in consultation because achieving adequate self-esteem is essential to be happy and be successful and achieve everything that one sets out for..
AUTHOR: Pablo Lopez, psychologist from Tuyo Psychologists in Madrid and Castellón.